Sometimes books wait for you, for the right time. The Language of Letting Go was a book I bought when I was 22 and a friend I waitressed with suggested it. I tried to read it daily and I was lost. Nothing resonated and it was just confusing. Six years later, on the phone with you, heartbroken after a breakup you said, "I think there's a book that may help." I responded, "That book is on my bookshelf." From that day forward, this book has been my touchpoint, my guide and a gift to so many others. I cannot count the times I have had a conversation with a friend and then read the meditation and it directly spoke to the situation. It was a true gift and I thank you so much for it!
I recently came across another book you gifted me 20 years ago that had not resonated before but this year it has clicked-Simple Abundance. You have always been wise beyond your years. Your insight is a gift to so many. Keep being courageous and sharing your work with the world.
Wow! Thank you for all of this and for sharing these stories. Yes, sometimes books wait for you, and sometimes we return to books. Now, to figure out where my copy of The Language of Letting Go is, probably in a pile somewhere. I think I’ll want it after finishing Codependency No More. 🤗
Thank you so much for helping me return to this. This was today's thought, "What a great gift we've been given - ourselves. To listen to ourselves, to trust instinct and intuition, is to pay tribute to that gift," and it found me just where and when I needed it. I'm going to try and read these daily meditations as a Lenten practice this season. Love you!
“I think about how when I am alone, I feel free. Solitude is good for the soul, but I wonder if part of the reason I crave solitude is because it allows me to let go of the responsibility I feel for the people I love.”
I love this thought and definitely relate to it. Why are you making me think so hard before 9 a.m.? 🙂
I joke that I’ve spent thousands of dollars on therapy/books/etc. to help me learn to surrender - it’s the lesson I have to keep learning and probably will still be learning on my deathbed. So I’m with you! I love how your aunt gifted you
Melody’s book and how you’ve kept coming back to it.
I read once that the Buddhist notion of “letting go” could more accurately be translated as letting be. For some reason, this feels much more attainable to me, like I can set the thing down for a bit instead of the finality that my mind associates with surrender.
I love the concept of let it be. I loved your post so much when I read it. I think I probably need a reread as I too will be working on this letting go thing for life.
"I think about how when I am alone, I feel free. Solitude is good for the soul, but I wonder if part of the reason I crave solitude is because it allows me to let go of the responsibility I feel for the people I love." Oof, that one hit home. This is one of positive things I've noticed during empty nesting--I am no longer the "feelings monitor" of everyone in the house.
Well darned if this doesn’t give me something to think about! I had started to read Codependent No More ages ago, but was so resistant to the idea that it was me, so I stopped. Maybe I should dig it back up again 😒
My daughter is a junior in high school so I think it was a natural time for me to revisit what it means to let go. I think in this case though I prefer Sara’s language of let it be. Thanks for quoting and restacking Kim. I appreciate you.
Yoga with Adriene has saved my sanity so many times throughout the years. Her 30 days of yoga series has been a constant in my life every January for so many years, and I'm always excited when I "meet" others who participate in her yoga series 🧡
She’s so amazing. I think the world would be so much better if we all did yoga with Adriene but again I remind myself to start with me. So glad you are here Sonbol!
I just finished a meditation on the Plum Village app by Kaira Jewel Lingo called Equanimity and Letting Go before reading your beautiful essay, and Adrienne's practice today was a lovely, slow hip opening session on releasing, so I feel like the message for me this week (and all of the following weeks) is very clear. :)
Tera, your recs are so good. I think that’s how I found Adrienne. I’m loving this 31 day practice but I didn’t start until the first week in January and I’ll probably skip weekends. It’s so good though I might just reset in February.
I was just talking about this book with a friend of mine who is going through a hard time in a relationship with a partner struggling with depression. It’s so difficult to see the people we love hurting. We discussed how we “know” we are not responsible for other people’s happiness (we read all the books!) but, my goodness, it takes so much patience and practice to allow that letting go in our hearts and in our bodies.
Yes! I find the pairing of the words with the yoga helps me incorporate the idea into practice. But sometimes when we are in it, we are in survival mode.
Hi! I don’t know you, but I love your work, and I want to thank you for doing the live recordings. They make it so easy to listen while I’m folding or putting clothes away (which is my part-time job). You’re inspiring me to try the recording feature. 💕
Hi Simone. Thanks for being here and sharing such a generous comment. I am so glad you love my work. That means so much. I’m also glad the live recordings work for you. I hope you enjoyed Cato’s barking this morning. I enjoy doing them. As evidenced by the barking, I usually do them in one or two takes. They help me edit. I then listen to them while I walk which also helps me edit and reflect and savor what I wrote. I also really enjoy when people do the live recordings, so let me know if you decide to do one. Maybe it will get me to fold my laundry. 😊
Yes, this is all so relatable. 🦋In a guided meditation I like to listen to by Thich Nat Hanh, he says: “There is nothing more important than my peace and my joy.” This felt kind of revolutionary the first time I heard it, but now it something I go back to over and over--reminding myself that I am much more equipped to share peace and joy when I am cultivating it in myself.
Sometimes books wait for you, for the right time. The Language of Letting Go was a book I bought when I was 22 and a friend I waitressed with suggested it. I tried to read it daily and I was lost. Nothing resonated and it was just confusing. Six years later, on the phone with you, heartbroken after a breakup you said, "I think there's a book that may help." I responded, "That book is on my bookshelf." From that day forward, this book has been my touchpoint, my guide and a gift to so many others. I cannot count the times I have had a conversation with a friend and then read the meditation and it directly spoke to the situation. It was a true gift and I thank you so much for it!
I recently came across another book you gifted me 20 years ago that had not resonated before but this year it has clicked-Simple Abundance. You have always been wise beyond your years. Your insight is a gift to so many. Keep being courageous and sharing your work with the world.
Wow! Thank you for all of this and for sharing these stories. Yes, sometimes books wait for you, and sometimes we return to books. Now, to figure out where my copy of The Language of Letting Go is, probably in a pile somewhere. I think I’ll want it after finishing Codependency No More. 🤗
It’s online, too!
https://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/thought-for-the-day
Thank you so much for helping me return to this. This was today's thought, "What a great gift we've been given - ourselves. To listen to ourselves, to trust instinct and intuition, is to pay tribute to that gift," and it found me just where and when I needed it. I'm going to try and read these daily meditations as a Lenten practice this season. Love you!
Yes! Thank you friend!
What beautiful stories ❤️
“I think about how when I am alone, I feel free. Solitude is good for the soul, but I wonder if part of the reason I crave solitude is because it allows me to let go of the responsibility I feel for the people I love.”
I love this thought and definitely relate to it. Why are you making me think so hard before 9 a.m.? 🙂
It might be my lightbulb moment of the year. I’ll throw an escape read out there soon. Maybe a post on how I took up statue making.
I joke that I’ve spent thousands of dollars on therapy/books/etc. to help me learn to surrender - it’s the lesson I have to keep learning and probably will still be learning on my deathbed. So I’m with you! I love how your aunt gifted you
Melody’s book and how you’ve kept coming back to it.
I read once that the Buddhist notion of “letting go” could more accurately be translated as letting be. For some reason, this feels much more attainable to me, like I can set the thing down for a bit instead of the finality that my mind associates with surrender.
I wrote a bit more about it here if it’s helpful: https://sarabytheseason.substack.com/p/the-way-forward-is-awkward
Thanks for this! ❤️
I love the concept of let it be. I loved your post so much when I read it. I think I probably need a reread as I too will be working on this letting go thing for life.
"I think about how when I am alone, I feel free. Solitude is good for the soul, but I wonder if part of the reason I crave solitude is because it allows me to let go of the responsibility I feel for the people I love." Oof, that one hit home. This is one of positive things I've noticed during empty nesting--I am no longer the "feelings monitor" of everyone in the house.
Feelings monitor -yup, totally get that. I love you leaving into and sharing the gifts of empty nesting.
Well darned if this doesn’t give me something to think about! I had started to read Codependent No More ages ago, but was so resistant to the idea that it was me, so I stopped. Maybe I should dig it back up again 😒
My daughter is a junior in high school so I think it was a natural time for me to revisit what it means to let go. I think in this case though I prefer Sara’s language of let it be. Thanks for quoting and restacking Kim. I appreciate you.
Yoga with Adriene has saved my sanity so many times throughout the years. Her 30 days of yoga series has been a constant in my life every January for so many years, and I'm always excited when I "meet" others who participate in her yoga series 🧡
She’s so amazing. I think the world would be so much better if we all did yoga with Adriene but again I remind myself to start with me. So glad you are here Sonbol!
I just finished a meditation on the Plum Village app by Kaira Jewel Lingo called Equanimity and Letting Go before reading your beautiful essay, and Adrienne's practice today was a lovely, slow hip opening session on releasing, so I feel like the message for me this week (and all of the following weeks) is very clear. :)
Tera, your recs are so good. I think that’s how I found Adrienne. I’m loving this 31 day practice but I didn’t start until the first week in January and I’ll probably skip weekends. It’s so good though I might just reset in February.
Letting go is somethings the most difficult thing...
Yes!
I was just talking about this book with a friend of mine who is going through a hard time in a relationship with a partner struggling with depression. It’s so difficult to see the people we love hurting. We discussed how we “know” we are not responsible for other people’s happiness (we read all the books!) but, my goodness, it takes so much patience and practice to allow that letting go in our hearts and in our bodies.
Yes! I find the pairing of the words with the yoga helps me incorporate the idea into practice. But sometimes when we are in it, we are in survival mode.
Hi! I don’t know you, but I love your work, and I want to thank you for doing the live recordings. They make it so easy to listen while I’m folding or putting clothes away (which is my part-time job). You’re inspiring me to try the recording feature. 💕
Hi Simone. Thanks for being here and sharing such a generous comment. I am so glad you love my work. That means so much. I’m also glad the live recordings work for you. I hope you enjoyed Cato’s barking this morning. I enjoy doing them. As evidenced by the barking, I usually do them in one or two takes. They help me edit. I then listen to them while I walk which also helps me edit and reflect and savor what I wrote. I also really enjoy when people do the live recordings, so let me know if you decide to do one. Maybe it will get me to fold my laundry. 😊
Yes, this is all so relatable. 🦋In a guided meditation I like to listen to by Thich Nat Hanh, he says: “There is nothing more important than my peace and my joy.” This felt kind of revolutionary the first time I heard it, but now it something I go back to over and over--reminding myself that I am much more equipped to share peace and joy when I am cultivating it in myself.
I love the wisdom of Thich at Hanh. Talk about inner peace. Happy Sunday Claire! Thanks for reading.